It's legitimately strong, not something where they can just take a deep breath and push through it. My ex had been on his own since he was thirteen, without proper parental guidance or education. The real thing involves time, effort, and even allowing yourself to be vulnerable — none of which are necessarily easy.
This hinders a shy guy in two ways. You know what I mean! You need to decide what person you are and what person you want to be. When I like someone I give a lot of myself, including my time, my emotions, and affection.